Signs from Sam

I really don't know what was worse for me, seeing Sam's lifeless body for the first time or having to bury her knowing that I would never get to see her again other than in pictures. Even though when I saw her for the first time in the funeral home and I knew her soul was gone, it was still the body that housed it for 17 yrs. it used to be a body that I could hug, and kiss. I could no longer touch her hair, hear her voice or see her smile. Even as mad as Sam had sometimes made me in the past, I didn't care, I just wanted so badly to have her back. If i couldn't have her back then all I needed was some kind of sign that she was okay, that she was infact where everyone said she was... in Heaven.

After Sams burial when I got home, I walked into my house and went straight for the bathroom. I sat in there and cried and pleaded.... PLEASE! Please send me a sign that she is okay. PLEASE! Nothing moved, not even the toilet paper. With that, I went to bed. Maybe 15 mins. later my son started banging at the window but all I could make out was "Mom" I couldn't hear him through the closed window and I was in no mood to get out of bed to ask him what he wanted. He just keeps banging. "What Edward?" "I can't hear you" So he comes running through the front door. "Come here Mom!" "You have to see this!" Reluctant to see anything at this point I get out of bed and walk out the front door behind my son and he points to the sky above my house. There it was! My sign from Sam that she was okay. A rainbow! It was the most beautiful rainbow, most colorful, the biggest one I had ever seen. It was complete from beginning to end. It made so much sense because Sam loved to color with her crayons in her coloring books and draw pictures. Her nieces looked forward to coloring with her. She had sent us a rainbow to let us know she was okay. She made it home....